Drum Roll Please....
10. ARRRGH! CRAMP! CRAMP!
9. Nice Kitty, Pretty Kitty....
8. And give up my curse?! Never!
7. Can I give you a backrub Pop?
6. The hell with my honor! Nabiki, Prepare to die!
5. I feel pretty, oh so pretty....
4. Like this? Is this how you like it Happosai?
3. Akane's been kidnapped? Aw, let the bitch go!
2. Kodachi, I love you....Make me your own!
And the number one thing Ranma would never say....
1. Oh my!
Ta Da!!!!
I wrote this after reading Ifurita's Top Ten Intro's to a fanfic that
you don't want to see. Hope it gave you a chuckle :)
Sincerely,
Megane 6.7
Subject: [FFML] Top Ten Rejected Lines for Akane Tendo
10. Oh yes Kunou darling! Spout your irreverant poetry to me!
9. I wonder how I would look with an eyebrow ring?
8. I can't practice martial arts now! I'm drying my nails!
7. You know, when I really think about it, Gosunkugi is pretty sexy....
6. Ouch! Will someone please open this for me? My hands
are too fragile.
5. P-Chan and Ryouga are one and the same?!?! Cool!
4. Me cook? Are you out of your mind?!?
3. Why jog every morning when I can be carried?
2. Take my underwear Happosai! It's not like I wear it anyway!
And the number one rejected line for Akane Tendo is....
1. I love you.....Dr. Tofu.
Ta Da!!!
There's the second of my Rejected Lines Series. More on the way as I think of them! ;)
Sincerely,
Megane 6.7
Top Ten Rejected Lines for Shampoo....
Drum Roll Please....
10. The Rain in Spain falls mainly on the Plain.
9. *I* am Shampoo. Hear *Me* Roar!
8. Ranma! Shampoo not dressed! Get out!
7. Shampoo tired of chasing Ranma! Shampoo want to be Hooters
girl!
6. Girl type Ranma! Shampoo Sue!
5. Shampoo man trapped in woman's body!
4. Aiya! Gosunkugi too skilled for Shampoo!
3. Shampoo no kiss on first date, Ranma.
2. Ai ren, You no want Shampoo? Okay, Shampoo marry Mousse instead.
And the number one rejected line for Shampoo is....
1. Shampoo a little bit country, Shampoo a little bit rock and roll.
Ta Da!!!
Okay, I'm going to bed now, I'll probably have some more by tomorrow.
Sincerely,
Megane 6.7
Subject: [FFML] Top Ten Rejected Lines for Tatewaki Kunou....
Top Ten Rejected Lines for Tatewaki Kunou....
Drum Roll Please....
Akane: Hey! How come I didn't get a drum roll for my lines!?
I forgot, okay? Now where were we....
Oh yes....
10. Thank you for all your help Sasuke. I really appriciate it!
9. I am the Blue Thunder of Furink.....Ah, screw it.
8. My Bokken....I love it SO MUCH!
7. I'm not that great, Ranma is much better than I'll ever be.
6. I'm sick of the pig-tailed girl! I want nude photos of YOU,
Nabiki!
5. I have no need of my bokken anymore....^ÓTENSHIN AMAGURIKEN!!!^Ô
4. Akane said no? Okay then I'll leave quietly.
3. Nude Photos of the pig-tailed girl! Going cheap!
2. I have decided to persue a life in the field of accounting.
and the number one rejected line for Kunou is....
1. Tsubasa. I love you. I would date with you!
Ta Da!!!!
This is fun! I could do this all night.... ;)
Subject: [FFML] Top Ten Rejected Lines for Ukyou Kuonji....
Just when you though it was safe to view your mail again....
Top Ten Rejected Lines for Ukyou Kounji....
Drum Roll Please....
10. If I have to cook one more Okonomiyaki, I'm going to scream!
9. Tsubasa! You look so cute in that dress!
8. You're a really good friend Shampoo!
7. I wish I could be as feminine as Akane....
6. Maybe I shouldn't bound my breasts anymore....I'll just go topless!
5. Cup Ramen has got to be the best food in the world!
4. Ah, who cares about my resturant? I'm going to a disco!
3. Of course I forgive you Genma! What's ten years between friends?
2. Ranchan, I have a confession....Tsubasa and I are more alike that
you think....
And the number one rejected line for Ukyou Kuonji is....
1. Ranchan looks even cuter as a girl.
Ta Da!!!
We only just begun....
Subject: [FFML] Top Ten Rejected Lines for Ryouga Hibiki....
Top Ten Rejected Lines for Ryouga Hibiki....
Drum Roll Please....
10. Second house to the right, you can't miss it ma'am.
9. How many headbands am I wearing anyway!? I can't get rid of
them!!!
8. Can someone please open this jar of pickles for me?
7. Pass the pork chops please.
6. Say Akane, you're looking a little chubby! Have you gained
weight?
5. Ranma! Prepare to die....your hair. It'll really look
becoming!
4. I hate sleeping with Akane! She snores like a rusty chainsaw!
3. Yuck! Akane, get some cooking lessons for god's sake!
2. Ranma-Chan, can I stare at your naked until my nose stops bleeding?
And the number one rejected line for Ryouga Hibiki is....
1. It's not an umbrella! It's a parasol!
Ta Da!!!
Three Down....One to go!
Subject: [FFML] Top Ten Rejected Lines for Mousse....
Top Ten Rejected Lines for Mousse....
Drum Roll Please....
(The Drum finally breaks from repeated use. Megane 6.7 sighs and brings out a electronic keyboard. After programming it, he pushes a button and it plays an electronic drum roll sample as he continues.)
10. Goodbye glasses, Hello contacts!
9. Weapons aren't the only thing I keep under this robe....
8. Steamed duck! My favorite!
7. Here I am Cologne! The father of your children!
6. Ranma, could you please tell Shampoo not to beat me up anymore?
5. I can slice! I can dice! I can even make french fries!
Only 19.95!
4. The hell with Shampoo! I'm touring with David Copperfield!
3. I'm going for the world record for most hidden weapons on a body!
2. Mousse defeat you Ranma! Mousse love Shampoo!
and the number one rejected line for Mousse is....
1. I don't need to see you Shampoo, my hands tell me all I need to know.
Ta Da!!!
We're halfway there....
Subject: [FFML] Top Ten Rejected Lines for Nabiki Tendo....
Top Ten Rejected Lines for Nabiki Tendou.
10. I let my fists do the bargaining for me.
9. Money is the root of all evil!
8. I keep the best photos of Ranma-Chan for myself....
7. I don't want your yen Kuno-baby, I only want your love!
6. Ryouga is P-Chan? Ah, I'll let that slide.
5. Let me cook dinner tonight, Kasumi....
4. I'm rich in spirit and that's all I'll ever need.
3. Are my shorts too tight? Maybe I should wear something more
modest..
2. Daddy, could you engage me to someone too?
And the number one rejected line for Nabiki Tendo is....
1. Think nothing of it.
Ta Da!!!
That's it for tonight. I'd like to thank Jorge A. Pratt for helping me out a bit on these lists. I'll try to come up with more tomorrow but I'm staring to run out of characters! :)
Sincerely,
Megane 6.7
Subject: [FFML] [FFML] Top Ten Rejected Lines for Priss Asagiri...
This is a disease. Even more so than writing Ranma fics (something I swore I'd never do, and then, well, wrote some).
Top Ten Rejected Lines for Priss Asagiri...
Drum Roll Please....
10. To hell with this, I'm going to sell my body to the record execs
and make a fortune.
9. Yeah, what do you mean there's a boomer rampage? Who cares?
8. Go ahead, Nene, I'll hang back and do comm while
you fight.
7. Oh, Leon, you're right, we should go to that hotel.
6. Well, Leon, you got one right. The others are Sylia Stingray,
Nene Romanova....
5. Nope, I've given up singing. I'm just a bar-girl now.
4. Oh, Mackie. I never noticed YOU standing there.
3. No, Sylia, I can't make it. I've got to do a show at Hot Legs.
2. Make it $100 and you've got a night.
And the number one rejected line for Priss Asagiri is....
1. "Tee Hee!"
That's it. Only 6 more BGC chars to go.
Oh, anyone who does these, please send them to me. I'll put them up
on my web page sometime.
--
Subject: [FFML] [FFML] Top Ten Rejected Lines: Yotsuya
Well, Mihoshi is seeing a lot of these... so Mihoshi will jump on the bandwagon too! ^^; Here's the Top Ten lines Yotsuya of Maison Ikkoku would never say...
10. Akemi, do you think you could put something on? You'll
catch a cold...
9. I don't have a job, I just bum off Godai.
8. You see, I'm really immortal...
7. My plans for today? Let me lay them out for you.
6. Godai! Stop flirting with Kozue, you indecisive, and
marry Kyoko!
5. Nikaido's pretty cool, actually. We shouldn't pick on
him.
4. Kentaro, would you like to come to work with me?
3. Let's party in _my_ room tonight.
2. Ne, Godai-kun, would you like some of my ramen? I have
plenty.
And the number one line Yotsuya would never say is...
1. Sorry, no liquor for me. I'll just have a milk.
Wai! Top tens! What a neat idea! Gomen, just needed
a break from current
writings. @_@ Mihoshi just felt like it. ^^;
From the Home Offices on Jurai....top 10 Rejected Lines from Mihoshi
10) "No Kiyone, you can do it by yourself."
9) "Washuu-chan...let me help you with that..."
8) "If I only had a brain..."
7) "I'm leaving the GP and Joing Star Fleet!"
6) "No, no more for me...I'm full..."
5) "I"m going to land properly this time"
4) "Wai! Mihoshi must go to a Speach Tyeripist!"
3) "Dinners Ready!!!"
2) "Yes...I think they preformed Medical Experiments on me..."
and the number one rejected Line from Mihoshi...
1) "I understand everything completly..."
Hehe....Next time....Sasami or Ryoko...
Subject: [FFML] [NOISE] Top 10 things *I'd* never say...
Forget fictional characters, let's get into reality. Here are
the top 10 lines you'll never hear me say on the FFML.
10. Ryouga and Ukyou, of course! After all, it's in the
anime, so it's canon!
9. I've almost finished that author fic. You guys mind
if I steal Akane from Ranma? (Vaughn, is that you?)
8. Hey, let's remember, these are *comedies*! Let's not
get too serious...(oops, this is an actual quote from
someone else...calling the Lovely Angels...)
7. Just gotta send that Keiichi rape scene off to Kun-chan forprereading...
(As a sidebar, how 'bout Top 10 things Kun-chan would never sayon this
list. I'll make it harder: you can't use Trish Ledoux.)
6. HEY D00DZ1!1! WHERE CAN I FIND THOZE COOL PORNO RANMA
FICS I KEEP HEARING ABOUT!!!
5. Richard Lawson? Eh. Overrated.
4. I could just sit here arguing the same things about Akari
and Ukyou all day... (whoops, that's the CORML)
3. I've decided to have Keiichi and Belldandy get a quickie divorce.
Thanks, Jeff!
2. To hell with characterization, where's the martial arts?
and the #1 thing you'll never hear me say on the FFML...
(and I was tempted to say Buttafuoco here, but didn't):
1. Of course I loved Within the Candle Flame!!! Totally incharacter!
--Sean Gaffney
--seriously tired...
Subject: [FFML] [FFML] [Noise][Humor][Top 10] Top 10 Reasons to Kill a Fanfic author
The plague continues! It should be noted that this is a totallypointless activity, on par with Revengefics and Spamfics. and everyone knows that The Prime Saggitarian doesn't miss out on pointlessactivities! so here's my contribution.
TOP TEN REASONS FOR BRUTALLY KILLING A FANFIC AUTHOR:
10. Nabiki converts to communism
9. Ukyou switches from an okonomiyaki restaurant to a McDonald's franchise
8. Sasuke marries Akane/Ukyou/Shampoo
7. Their fic begins "Well, I never saw/read the anime/manga, but my
friend told me all about it..."
6. Sylia begins sleeping with Mackie
5. Happosai sleeps with ANYONE
4. Ranma begins sleeping with Kunou... as a guy.
3. They write a Lemon scene featuring 'D' from 'Project A-ko'
2. A 'My Neighbor Totoro/Legend of the Overfiend' Crossover
AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON FOR KILLING A FANFIC AUTHOR:
1. They repeatedly post those damned 'Test' messages!
The Prime Saggitarian,
Alpha Centauri
Subject: [FFML] [fanfic] Chasing the Wind Part 9
Top 10 Lame Excuses why Chasing the Wind Part 9 wasn't posted on Saturday
like I said it would:
10. "You mean today isn't Saturday?"
9. "My dog ate my hard drive."
8. "Deadlines were meant to be broken."
7. "The Ukyo fans were mumbling something about charcoal briquettes
and lighter fluid."
6. "Captain Morgan, sir; JA."
5. "I was waiting on someone's C&C for the lemon part."
4. "I just got my scanner working and was distracted."
3. "There was a reactor accident on the waterfront and I got
contaminated."
2. <In best 'Joliet' Jake Blues voice> "There was a hurricane!
A fire! A flood! IT WASN'T MY FAULT, I SWEAR TO GOD!!!"
1. "The power went out in my barracks building and killed about
7 hours of work. Guess next time I'll take that classic computer RPG advice
and 'save often, save early.'"
Note: Number One is true.
Most of you have probably skipped right past this part anyway so I won't
waste any more of your time...
From: Caroline Ann Seawright Subject: Re: [FFML] [NOISE] Top 10 things *I'd* never say...
> 7. Just gotta send that Keiichi rape scene off to Kun-chan
for> prereading...
>
> (As a sidebar, how 'bout Top 10 things Kun-chan would never say >
on this list. I'll make it harder: you can't use Trish Ledoux.)
Heh ... okay, lets try this ...
Top 10 things Kun-chan would never say:
10. Yeah, I'm actually the one who taught the people at Viz to spell
the names like 'Ryoga', 'Kuno', 'Ukyo' ....
9. Oh, yeah! You're right! 'Colour' should be corrected to be spelled
as 'color'!
8. America's so cool - I want to live there!
7. Hey, send me all those sad fics - I love them.
6. Yeah, what I think is wrong ... you're right!
5. Shampoo's a sexy babe - I want her!
4. Chris - that story was actually *normal*!
3. Hey ... maybe I should send in some 'test' messages to see if the
ML is alive, or if I've been kicked off the list ...
2. Hmmm... Maybe I should stop calling John Biles 'Jimbo'...
And the number 1 thing that I'd never say:
1. Maybe I should stop writing lemon 'fics, for good?
Kun-chan...
Subject: [FFML] [NOISE] [SPAM] Another Top 10 (Actually Top 11) (BGC)
I _really_ should not be doing this (I have 2 stories I promised myself I'd work on, and I'm at work), but this is too tempting to pass up. So now I present....
The Top Eleven People that will _never_ be recruited by the Knight Sabres!
<DrumRoll Please>
11: Arielle (And Sylia thought _Mackie_ was annoying!)
10: Tendo Kasumi ("Would you like some tea Largo-san?)
09: Elizabeth Dole (I could see her working for Genom's PR department)
08: One Word, Mihoshi!
07: Susan 'Miss Perinnial Hostage' Storm, The Invisible Girl (as opposed
to Susan 'Ms Pound Whole Team Into Ground Without Lifting a Finger' Richards,
The Invisible Woman)
06: Lum-chan (Are you aware of what that much voltage can _do_ to a
HardSuit?!?)
05: Another Word: Smurfette!
04: Tsukino Usagi (Sorry kid, But Boomers don't wait for people to
finish their Speeches before attacking)
03: Dominique 'Demona' Destine (Sylia: "You are a psychotic gargoyle
mage with genocidal intentions towards my species. In addition, you
are clinically immortal and will regenerate any damage done to your body...
I think you're just what we're looking for.")
02: Two Final Words: Lynn Minmei
And the number one person who will never be recruited into the Knight Sabres is....
01: Any fanfic writer that cannot provide their own Battle Armour!! :)
HTG (Don't shoot me!)
Top Ten Signs that the new BGC TV series is another BGCrash...
10) Knight Sabers get a Cabbit for a new team mascot
9) All Boomers operating with Windows 3.11 as an OS
8) Transformation into Hardsuits followed by phrase 'Hard Suit Ni Nare!!'
7) Sylia is revealed to be an intellectually enhanced Human
6) Three words : Stock Footage Galore!!
5) Rumoured new Knight Saber looks a hell of alot like Princess Sasami
4) Genom? What's Genom?
3) Priss mellows out even more and becomes a country idol
2) AD Police more effective than Knight Sabers
And the Number 1 sign that the new BGC TV series is another Crash..
1) Boomer death count at the end of the first epsiode: Priss 0, Nene
8
TEN TOP REJECTED LINES FOR SAILOR MOON:
MERCURY
10. Hey, pass the beer!
9. Ohmigosh, that is, like, so UN-cool, Serena!
8. After learning DOS, operating this hyper-advanced, mega-techie Moon
Technology(c) computer is a piece of cake!
7. <in a dark room, with a man, dressed in leather, whip in hand>
Kneel, boy!
6. Hurry up, Serena, I've got an apointment with my hairdresser at
four
and my manicurist at five.
5. Whew! This Haitian ganga is really strong… just the way I like it!
4. Screw the Negaverse... I want to party!
3. I know that if I had used a smaller font I would've been able to
pack
in more answers into this cheat sheet... Damn.
2. I'd help you more often, Serena, if you weren't so bitchy.
1. If you can really predict the future Richard, predict this! <pinches
a certain part of his anatomy>
SERENA
10. Ugh... Darien, no tongue, no tongue!
9. Allright! Next period: Chemistry!
8. Take that cake away from me...I don't want to get fat!
7. <takes out a home-pregnancy test> Mamo-chan... remember that
time we
went out a couple of months ago?
6. Oh my god, what a hunk! Einstein's MY favorite intellectual idol...
5. After my operation you can’t call me a flatchest anymore, neh, Rei-chan?
4. <in a dark room, with Mamoru, dressed in leather, tied up> In
the
name of the Moon, punish me!
3. Screw the Moon Sceptre! Gimme a tommygun to fill these bastards
with lead!
2. Was the Integral of <arcsin 3x> the derivative of <natural
log of e>
or the <natural log of y squared>?
1. I’m the Moon Princess, Rei, remember? So you can kiss my ROYAL ass!
Hope you liked it.
Luis Majluf <98lmajlu@amersol.edu.pe>
> TOP FOUR REJECTED LINES FOR HIKARU GOSUNKUGI (All I could think of):
>
> 4. I'm Hikaru Gosunkugi. You've heard of me, of course.
>
> 3. Nah, that plan's too complicated, I'll just beat him up.
>
> 2. Okay, I admit it! My voodoo stuff doesn't work!
>
> and my own choice for Gosunkugi's #1 rejected line:
>
> 1. Akane, shut up!
Without soliciting Gary's permission (shame on me) I've taken the
liberty of filling in the upper five.
10. Who? Me? Spying?
9. We're buddies, ain't we, Ranma? Ain't we, huh, huh?
8. Ni hao!
7. Yo! Bum rush the show!
6. I wouldn't know a camera if it came up and bit me on the ass.
5. So long now, I've got to study for my Ethics exam.
Hope y'all like.
DRM