22 Free food
Monday 31 May 2004

I first heard about it from various people but is seemed no one had actually been there. They said it was in Jalan such-and-such. There were long queues. Someone else said a different street or even a different area. I wasn't too concerned. Food is cheap enough here. I do not like queues and was not going to queue to save a few ringgit on a meal of dubious quality.

The stories continued. It was a free vegetarian restaurant. Apparently some wealthy guy had survived the Bali bombing and to say thank you he had set up these (the story said there were more in other cities) free restaurants. No one I spoke to had ever eaten there. Eventually I dismissed it as an urban myth.

One day Dan said to me, 'I found the free restaurant.'

'Have you actually eaten there?' I asked.

Yes, he had. And it was quite good. He gave me directions.

Restoran Amituofoh is in what is called the 'new' part of Melaka. The new part of Melaka is built on reclaimed land. The area was once under the sea. The restaurant is clean—cleaner than many of the other restaurants in town. You take a plate and fill it up from the buffet. I do not usually like this type of arrangement. Food left sitting gathers bacteria. But turnover here is so good that fresh trays of food are brought out regularly. Most trays would not stay long enough for bacteria to build up. Still, I choose carefully. There is a reasonable range of vegetable dishes including vegetables we don't often see in Australia. There is also rice, tofu cooked in various ways, a curry or two, soup, tea and water. You can take as much as you like. Second helpings are OK. When you finish you wash your own dishes.

I asked one of the staff about the place. It was, he said, sponsored by a wealthy man who chooses to remain anonymous. He made no mention of the Bali bombing story. I suggested it looked like it was run by a Buddhist organisation. It is and it looks to be staffed by volunteers. While you eat you can listen to dharma talks from their master on one of the two video monitors. A prerequisite for understanding this is a working knowledge of Mandarin. If the monitors are off, there is usually audio of chanting. Free Buddhist books and CDs are also available. These too are in Mandarin.

'Customers' seem to come from a broad spectrum of society. They include all the races of Malaysia plus a few of us visitors. There are young adults, through to the elderly. Some come as families, some alone. Some look middle class, some less affluent. I have seen owners of other restaurants eating there on their day off. There is a contribution box for those who feel inclined to leave some money. Most people do.

I like to eat there because the food is fresh and nutritious. It is about as close as I have had in Asia to what I would cook for myself at home. I usually go alone but often find someone to chat with while I eat.

Another bonus at Restoran Amituofoh is that it is non-smoking. In Malaysia it seems that smoking is the norm and we non-smokers are second-class citizens. Many people have no concerns about lighting up while you are eating. There are no such problems at Amituofoh.

Restoran Amituofoh is open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Check it out when you visit Melaka.

21 Battling Bunga Raya
Sunday 30 May 2004

On weekdays I often take my bicycle for a four kilometre ride in the tropical heat through Melaka to Tzu Chi. I ride through the narrow streets of Chinatown, including the Indian section, cross the bridge over the river, turn left and find myself in Jalan Bunga Raya, which must be the busiest street in Melaka. Riding along it is quite an adrenalin rush.

Bunga Raya is not much more than a laneway. Well, to be honest you could squeeze three cars within its width, side by side. However, the left hand lane is a parking lane. It is a one-way street. I was going to say 'of course' but there are similar streets in Melaka that are two-way but that's another story (see below).

Riding down Bunga Raya, one has to contend with cars double-parked on the left; cars illegally parked on the right; cars badly parked so they block the next lane; someone trying to reverse park; someone trying to drive forward into a parking space, not making it and trying to reverse back out; trucks double-parked while they unload; motorcycles trying to cut you off when you head for a space only wide enough for one bike; motorcycles cutting you off when they turn left from your right; an extremely old person bravely trying to cross the road; bicycle rickshaws that take up the width of a small car but can't keep up with the traffic; a motor cycle riding against the traffic; and if this isn't enough, there is no official footpath, which means that pedestrians often walk down the centre of the street.

On top of all this there are a couple of unwritten rules that appear to apply here. The first I have noticed also applies in Thailand: the bigger vehicle always has right of way. The second I have only noticed here and is often claimed by bicycle rickshaw riders as they move slowly into the traffic stream from a side road: if you don't look at them, they have to give way to you. I am not brave enough to claim the second rule but am always aware of, and often angered by, the first.

To enter into Bunga Raya is to take on the challenge. You get in there and ride hard. If you hesitate, you need to be dead lucky or you might just be dead. I go through a pair of brake blocks on my bike in a couple of weeks. Better than any carnival ride.

There are also a few narrow streets not far from where I live that are similar to Bunga Raya but the traffic is two-way. They exhibit most of the above-mentioned hazards. There seems to be a consensus that the traffic flows in one particular direction. Bicycles and motorcycles go against the traffic but that is par for the course on a one-way street here. Occasionally someone in a car or truck is brave enough to enter the street and try to drive through against the flow. This creates the most amazing chaos and makes excellent entertainment for anyone who has time to watch.

20 Definitely Malaysian
Saturday 29 May 2004

Writing that yesterday has prompted me to ask a few more of my Chinese friends whether they are Chinese or Malaysian. And everyone I asked said they were Malaysian first. They certainly identify strongly as Chinese but each one acknowledged that they were Malaysian first.

19 Malaysian or what?
Friday 28 May 2004

When I was in Thailand I knew many people who were of Chinese origin. Some were 100% Chinese others had a mix of Chinese and Thai blood. But I never got the idea that any ever thought of themselves as anything but Thai. Sure they practised some Chinese customs but there was no question of their being Thai first and foremost.

Singaporeans comprise a mix of races: Chinese, Indian, Malay and others. My Singaporean friends, no matter their ethnicity, even if they were born elsewhere, still call themselves Singaporeans.

I do not get the feeling that it is that way in Malaysia. Most of the people I mix with are Chinese. They have friends who are Malay, Indian and other races. However they seem to me to think of themselves as Chinese first. Some, when I ask them have told me quite strongly that they see themselves as Chinese rather than Malaysians. I am not sure of the reason for this, just reporting my observation.

18 Listening without projections
Thursday 27 May 2004

When I had my bookshops back in the '70s. (Was it really that long ago?) I used to sell books by a guy named John Lily. He was a brilliant scientist who researched communication with dolphins. He also did a lot of research on altered states. I think he invented the float tank. The movie, Altered States was inspired by, if not based on him.

He used to do a lot of acid and eventually his books could not be understood by those of us who did not indulge. (Happened to a few writers in those days, eg Tim Leary.) One of the books I really liked was 'Centre of the Cyclone'. Wish I could get a copy now. I think I can still paraphrase one of my favourite quotes from that book, which went something like: When you take on a new teacher you have to put aside everything you already know and listen as if everything your teacher says is true. Later, you can consolidate what you have learned with your earlier knowledge and discard anything that does not fit.

I think I was humble enough in those days to be able to do that—if I really trusted the teacher. I don't do it now. I think most people don't. And I think that is more or less what Krishnamurti was saying, when he said you listen 'with your projections, through your projection, through your ambitions, desires, fears, anxieties, through hearing only what you want to hear, only what will be satisfactory, what will gratify, what will give comfort, what will for the moment alleviate your suffering.'

As I have gotten older, I am reluctant to put aside what I have learned. For example, with Master Cheng Yen, I love about 90% of what she says. The same with Bhuddadassa. But I can no longer put my own ideas aside. I have done a lot of work in my life and I am not prepared to reject what I have learned, even temporarily. So, I hold myself back from going all the way with any of them. I can now have only one master, and that is me. Arrogant maybe, but no more than they are.

17 Cross-cultural communication
Wednesday 26 May 2004

Thought I would add a bit more about sincerity and why clear communication is necessary. Our cultures give different meanings to what we say.

For example, I read once that in Thailand if a man tells a woman that he likes her then it means he is seriously considering her as a wife. Perhaps this is changing but that is what the book said and certainly older Thais still see it this way.

In the West 'I like you' does not mean I am thinking of marrying you, nor does 'I love you'. I know that Thais have other ways of showing affection to their friends but these expressions are how Westerners show affection. If a Western man says one of these sentences and a Thai woman interprets it as a commitment, then when he explains that is not what he meant, perhaps she might think he was insincere.

He was not. There was simply a communication breakdown because of cultural differences. These sorts of communication problems happen even within cultures, so they will be much more common between two very different cultures.

The way to avoid this sort of problem is by what is called 'reflective listening'. When you have a conversation with someone you reflect back to them, in your own words, what you think it is they are saying. For example:

He says, 'I like you.'

She replies, 'Do you mean that you want to get involved with me seriously?'

And he can then clarify, 'Well no. But I really value your friendship.'

Then you know where you stand. And everyone is being sincere.

16 Bag snatchers
Tuesday 25 May 2004

In yesterday's Star newspaper there is a story of a Kuala Lumpur woman who has been attacked by bag snatchers four times in ten years. Chin Wai Fun, 37, had developed a fear of going out and would only go to the office and straight home again.

The fourth incident happened about one kilometre from her home at 3 pm Saturday. A car approached from behind and someone grabbed her bag. Wai Fun clung to the bag but fell and knocked her head on the road. She was still clutching her bag when passers-by found her lying unconscious. She never regained consciousness and died yesterday at 7 am.

In today's Star the police have declared war on snatch thieves. Police statistics show that there have been 4,511 snatch theft cases reported in the first four months of this year and 539 arrests. (I'm not sure if this is just KL.) Considering that it is probably the same people committing multiple crimes, that suggests the police are catching a good proportion of the perpetrators. But the crimes continue.

It was suggested to me that the criminals are drug addicts. They still need a fix when they are released from jail so they go back to raising money in the same way. Unless the root of the problem is addressed—effectively—the crimes will continue.

15 Why?
Sunday 23 May 2004

The other day a friend talked to me about my multiple thefts and asked, 'Do you hate all Malaysians now?'

Obviously the answer is no. But I can't help making comparisons and asking why. I don't have answers but I think it is worth looking at the situation to try to get some understanding.

Perhaps it is part of modernisation, Westernization, development or whatever you want to call it. I think back to when I was a kid in Brisbane. No one locked their door when they went out. Perhaps this is still the case in many Australian country towns. But not the cities. In the cities people often lock their doors while they are home.

One of my friends, in Sydney, recently emailed me to say that her office had been broken into once again and that this was the third time in a year that she had had a notebook computer stolen.

Melaka, I might add, is not a big city. The population of the whole state is, I think, less than one million.

From memory, I think the Isaan people in north-east Thailand are about as security conscious as we in Australia were 40-50 years ago. It is not that there are no thieves there. I did have a mobile phone stolen. But to put it into perspective, let me tell you a story about Bruce, a New Zealander who has lived in Thailand for 12 years. Bruce teaches at Rajabhat Institute, a college in Mahasarakham. One day we were going to lunch. He was heading home straight after, so on the way to the restaurant he picked up a few bottles of beer. He put the carton in the back of his ute/pick-up truck. When we stopped at the restaurant, in a busy street, I offered to put the beer in the front. 'Don't worry' he insisted. And sure enough it was still there when we returned.

Soon has suggested that the snatch thieves are drug addicts and they have to raise RM300 (approx A$110) each day to pay for their habit. He says they are therefore very professional. Although I gave the police the bike registration I have not heard that they have located the thieves. Soon suggested that the plates were fake or stolen.

Here in Malaysia, possession of drugs can bring the death penalty. Even so the drug problem is still great. A traveller who stayed here for a few nights told me that junkies were shooting up on the steps of the guest house she stayed in, in KL.

14 Boring?
Saturday 22 May 2004

I get comments from time to time about how interesting my life is. In between all the interesting bits, my life is just as boring as most people's in Australia. I guess one of the big differences that I appreciate is, that even what is normal here is different. Yeah, I suppose it is never boring. But just like in Oz, when you do or see something everyday it becomes normal. Although in Thailand I think the WOW factor, though diminished, was still alive after a year.

Since the second robbery I am rethinking about going to India. One good thing living where I do is that I meet many travellers. I hear both good and bad about India. There are some horror stories. Theft is always an issue there. They say that trains are the best way to travel there; but you daren't leave your things to go to the toilet. Some journeys last three days. Unless you are travelling with a friend what are you supposed to do? At the moment it is an issue I just don't want to tackle. Unless...hey, anyone want to travel India with me?

Soon, the proprietor of Sama Sama Guesthouse, is a reggae freak. He must own just about every reggae record ever made. As I write I am listening to a reggae CD from a South-American band named, I think, Adao Negro. Nice. I thought reggae was the extent of his taste until I mentioned that I like blues. He has almost as many blues records (mostly cassettes) and now plays them more than the reggae. This weekend is the anniversary of Bob Marley's funeral. A couple of his guitar-playing mates have come down from KL and we have had a two-night tribute party.

13 Sincerity
Friday 21 May 2004

One of my ex-students, a young Thai woman currently living in America, asked for some advice about American people, especially in relation to sincerity. As this could be of interest to others, I put my answer here.

I think that deep down everyone is the same but it is our cultures that make us different. Thai culture and American culture are very different. People's values are very different. People behave very differently. I do not believe one culture is right and one wrong or one good and one bad. They are simply different. It can be very challenging living in another culture. I look at it as an opportunity for me to learn and understand more about life.

Perhaps Americans make friends in a different way to Thai people. Thai people are very friendly, very interested in strangers. However I have found in Australia (very similar culture to America) when I moved to a new town that everyone had their friends. They did not need me. They didn't reject me. They just didn't need me. In this situation, if you want to make friends you have to go out of your way to do so. Thai people also need to understand the sort of questions that are usual in Thailand that are perhaps inappropriate in the West.

Sincerity. This is a big one. I do not think Americans are more or less sincere than Thai people. While I found most Thai people are sincere I certainly met some who were not. I would like to think that I am a sincere person. Quite a few years back I was a salesman. I was very different from many salespeople. I saw my job as finding out what my customers needs were and helping them to get what they needed. Unfortunately many salespeople are only interested in selling the customer what they have to sell, or perhaps what they can make the most money out of. Have you met people like that in Thailand? They are not sincere.

Likewise, sometimes you meet someone who pretends to be your friend but they are trying to convince you to do what they want, rather than thinking of what you want or what is best for you. I know one or two people like that in Thailand. Sometimes it is hard to tell if someone is sincere. One of the ways you can test this is to tell them (either the 'friend' or the salesperson) you want time to make up your mind. If they accept that, well they are probably sincere. If they try to pressure you to make a decision, they probably do not care about you. They are probably not sincere.

About American guys. Well, once again, I think this applies to guys anywhere. First, keep in mind what I have just written about sincerity. Next, I think you have to look at your own personal situation. You might think it is lucky to be beautiful but there is a bad side to it. You see, being able to recognize physical beauty is one of the easiest things in the world. A guy does not need to be intelligent or wise to recognize physical beauty. In your life, you may find many guys are attracted to you because of your physical beauty. Many of them will want to rush into something with you without getting to know you properly. A wise person knows that the beauty of your heart is much harder to recognize and that takes time. It is not up to me to tell you what is good or bad or right or wrong. Just keep this in mind when some guy sounds like he has fallen in love with you.

12 Writing process
Thursday 20 May 2004

I was asked recently by an ex-student (from Thailand) if I had anything on my website on writing. I didn't, but if I put this here, then I will.

I often find that when I have something important to write my mind keeps thinking about reasons to do something else. Eventually, I have a little talk with myself and I say, 'Look you don't have to finish it today. And you don't have to get it right. Just write. Whatever comes out of your head put it down (In my case that means type it into my computer) save it and leave it.'

That takes the pressure off. I just start writing. It does not matter if it is full of mistakes. Anything that comes into my head gets written down. Then I leave it.

The next day when I am feeling fresh I open the file and read it. Usually I am amazed that it is not so bad after all. I look at how I can improve it. Is everything clear? Now I have to think like a reader and ask myself if it makes sense. If not how can I improve it? Should I move this paragraph somewhere else? Have I rambled on too much and perhaps I need to delete a few sentences. Have I repeated myself? Things like grammar are really about how well it can be understood. If it can be understood then it is probably grammatically correct too.

If what I am writing is really important I get someone else to read it too. I have one or two friends who I trust that I can email it to and say, 'Is this OK? Can you suggest any changes?'

This part of the process is even more important if English is not your first language, what sounds right to you might not sound right to a native speaker. So, make sure that your friend is a native speaker.

Basically I just keep looking at it and looking for ways of improving it. Occasionally, I will leave it for a week or two and then write the whole thing again without looking at the first version. The next day I compare the two and ask myself which one is best. Or perhaps I can use the best parts of each one to make something even better. And still the process of refining and improving goes on.

11 It's happened again
Wednesday 19 May 2004

Yes, that's right. My bag has been stolen again. It is almost unbelievable.

So many people warn me about the bag snatchers who grab bags while they zoom past on a motorcycle. I always point out that, while my bag is in the carry basket of my bicycle, I keep the straps entwined thoroughly around the handlebars. But tonight I forgot.

I saw this bike several times as I was riding home. Now I realise why. They were checking me out. I was on a straight stretch, not all that far from home. I felt the presence of a motorcycle beside me and then my bag was grabbed and it sped off. I tried to catch them but I had no chance really. However I did get the number, which the police broadcast over their radio as soon as I reported it. But by time the police nab them, I'm sure most of my things will have been dumped—perhaps in the Melaka River.

So what was in it? Very little of value to them. A watch—a gift from some of my Thai students. The only other thing of value was my passport. At least this time I know the process of replacing it. Nothing else had any monetary value but I did lose a couple of notebooks with quite a bit of information in them. Hopefully nothing they can use. I thought I had lost my Visa card again but when I got home I found it in my shorts pocket. One less hassle.

10 Across the street culture
Wednesday 12 May 2004

Sometimes cultures can vary just by crossing the street. About 20 years ago, I moved with my family from Sydney to Brisbane. Melanie was 12 at the time. She befriended a girl of the same age across the road. Kylie (a genuine Australian name) came to sleep over one night. When it came time for breakfast, Kylie said, 'Eeergh. What's this?' I can't even remember what it was now. Probably muesli or something. I think she went home for breakfast. She thought that we were really strange. She found it hard to accept that there were many people who did not eat the same for breakfast as they did in their house. Not sure where Kylie is now. I wonder if she has ever done any travelling.

9 Getting it all together
Saturday 1 May 2004

I have more or less pieced my stuff together, although of course some things cannot be replaced. Just have to accept that and move on. I have a new passport and a new computer. I also have a new stamp on my passport that says I can stay in Malaysia for another three months. But after that, they say I must move on. Where? Will decide closer to the time. I decided that while I set up and get to know this computer I want to be somewhere that I know things work reasonably reliably. Also Tzu Chi has a busy time coming up. I think there will be opportunities for me to be useful there.

The other morning we had a mini Thaipusam festival (or something similar) at the Hindu temple down the street. The ultimate in body piercing! They ban this in India and apparently Indians come here to do it. Fortunately I got there late and did not get to see them pushing the steel rods through their cheeks; just the result. If I was a Hindu I think I would convert to Christianity rather than punish myself like this. Now I understand why Jesus took responsibility for everyones sins. Buddhists however do not harm themselves to attempt to remove bad karma. Photos coming to this website in due course. Hang in there.

My new computer is a Macintosh iBook G4/12"/800 with combo drive. I upgraded the ram to 640 mb, which is the maximum recommended for this computer. I have the standard 30 gig hard drive but I wish I had upgraded that too. The installed software takes up almost 10 gig. At the moment we are getting to know each other. OS 10.3 is very nice. After stuffing around with 10.0 for all those years, I have few complaints.

Today I was about to go to the PO. Soon told me that it is a holiday for May Day so it is closed. He also tells me that both Monday and Tuesday are holidays. One is Buddha's birthday and one is Mohammed's. We seem to disagree about which is which.

© copyright John Shield 2003 - 2004

To read this in the order it was written scroll to the bottom and start with number 9.

Blog archives
March 2004, includes: What I am doing in Melaka; Independence / Interdependence; Brother Yap; Why this blog is late.

April 2004, includes: My first trip to KL; Passport; New computer; Karma.

June 2004, includes: A democratic proposal; Towards a mail-forwarding etiquette; The smell of durian; Almost free food; Charity fair; Fighting evil; Attempted robbery; Smokers; Cyber cafes; Tropical fruit-lovers paradise; Consumer society; Another snatch-theft death; Passport application—again; Why I prefer squat toilets; If I had a mothball in this hand; Troubles in southern Thailand; Ninety-one today; Going back; Stopping the snatchers; Karma and choice; Hazy skies; Formula for happiness; Where to next?; Trishaw respect; Desire for union; My new grandson.

July 2004, includes: No water; Malaysian society & politics; Buying a camera; KL scam; Attachments; Garage Band; Grandchildren; Moves; Farewell Tzu Chi; Travelling: Melaka - Penang; Women in black; Bureaucracies: I can cope; Giving with no expectations; Back in Thailand; Making merit.

August 2004, includes: Back to Mahasarakham; Independence; Passing time; Observations from the omelette shop; Pad Pak; Procession; Storm; Famine?

September 2004, includes: Street vendors; The omelette shop; Shopping in Sri-sawas; Restaurants; Off to Udon; In Udon; Toad soup; Buying speakers; Sweet talk; The price of happiness; The right to vote.

October 2004, includes: The real issue; Who are the real Australians?; The Best?; Out of Thailand; Instant Millionaire; Nong Khai to Vientiane; National Library of Laos; Social security in Laos; Please help me!; Lao delicacy; Everyone wants a sponsor; Vientiane markets; Of girls and bombs; Pronunciation of names; Being dead; Renting a bicycle; Losing and gaining customers; Making plans again; Bun Nam Festival; Party's over.

November 2004, includes: Visa applicataon; Lao Tradition show; At the bus station; I didn't make it; Tips for travellers to Vientiane; Visit to an Isaan village; Crickets and grasshoppers; Don't eat cockroaches; Village of the Red Waterholes; Thai winter; All Asians look alike?

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