|
Ugly Men with Beautiful Women
|
| |
|
|
Scod:
|
Oooo...
|
|
Yon and Gatesy:
|
Bup-ba-dup-bup-bup-bup-bup-bup...
|
|
Scod:
|
Oo-oo-oooo...
|
|
Gatesy:
|
(Referring to Scod's abrupt entry) It's like pressing a button!
|
|
Yon:
|
Bup-ba-dup-bup-bup-bup-bup.
|
|
|
|
|
Scod:
|
Oooo...
|
|
Yon and Gatesy:
|
Bup-ba-dup-bup-bup-bup-bup-bup...
|
|
Scod:
|
Oo-oo-oooo...
|
|
Yon and Gatesy:
|
Bup-ba-dup-bup-bup-bup-bup.
|
|
|
|
|
Gatesy and Scod:
|
Ugly men with beautiful women,
|
|
Yon:
|
You see it...
|
|
Gatesy and Scod:
|
... all the time in the world today.
|
|
Yon:
|
Why is it...
|
|
Gatesy and Scod:
|
... ugly men are so attractive?
|
|
|
Women must look...
|
|
Yon:
|
... deep inside.
|
|
|
|
|
Scod:
|
They know we're...
|
|
Tripod:
|
... all ugly inside.
|
|
Scod:
|
'Cause we're all guts and stuff.
|
|
Gatesy:
|
And bile ducts.
|
|
Yon:
|
And pancreatic juice.
|
|
|
|
|
Tripod:
|
Yeah!
|
|
|
|
|
Scod:
|
Oooo...
|
|
Yon and Gatesy:
|
Bup-ba-dup-bup-bup-bup-bup-bup...
|
|
Scod:
|
Oo-oo-oooo...
|
|
Gatesy:
|
You're going to do yourself an injury.
|
|
Scod:
|
I know.
|
|
Gatesy:
|
You're going to hurt yourself.
|
|
|
|
|
Gatesy and Scod:
|
Ugly men with beautiful women,
|
|
Yon:
|
Women can...
|
|
Gatesy and Scod:
|
... see right past the ugly men's looks.
|
|
Yon:
|
Isn't it...
|
|
Gatesy and Scod:
|
... good to know women are morally superior?
|
|
Yon:
|
Wouldn't it be...
|
|
Gatesy and Scod:
|
... good if men were morally superior as well?
|
|
|
|
|
Yon and Scod:
|
Men and women are different,
|
|
|
In many varied ways.
|
|
|
Women wear dresses,
|
|
|
Men wear dresses,
|
|
|
We all wear dresses,
|
|
|
And that's where babies come from.
|
|
|
|
|
Scod:
|
Oooo...
|
|
Yon:
|
Bup-ba-dup...
|
|
|
|
|
Gatesy:
|
No, stop, stop, stop! Sorry to be "Mr Stoppity-the-Songs", copy?
|
|
Scod:
|
Why did you stoppity the song?
|
|
Gatesy:
|
I just stoppitied the song because that's not where babies come from.
|
|
Scod:
|
(Sarcastically) Oooh, look at me. I'm the one in the stripes. I know where babies come from.
|
|
Gatesy:
|
I do!
|
|
Scod:
|
Oooh, I do!
|
|
Gatesy:
|
You know, everyone knows where babies come from. Umm... when Mummy and Daddy love each other very much...
|
|
|
|
|
Audience member:
|
It's a miracle!
|
|
|
|
|
Gatesy:
|
It's... a little miracle if they do love each other very much.
|
|
Yon:
|
We don't do that kind of comedy.
|
|
|
|
|
Gatesy:
|
When Mummy and Daddy love each other... when they love each other very much, you know, you know... umm... Daddy organises a special harness and fits it to the ceiling, Mummy wears a pig mask, Daddy wears scuba gear, they put their favourite H.R. Puff'n'Stuff record on and it's on for young and old!
|
|
|
Or young and/or old, depending on the local laws.
|
|
|
|
|
|
THAT'S where babies come from! Uhhhh!
|
|
|
|
|
Gatesy:
|
Ugly men with beautiful women,
|
|
Scod:
|
Beautiful men with ugly women.
|
|
Tripod:
|
Yeah.
|
|
Yon:
|
Beautiful men with beautiful women,
|
|
Tripod:
|
Beautiful women with beautiful girls.
|
|
|
YEAH!
|
|
|
Gorgeous girls with beautiful ladies!
|
|
|
Hot young chicks who can't get enough!
|
|
|
|
|
|
I don't approve of Internet porn,
|
|
|
It's so wrong, it's reprehensible.
|
|
|
|
|
Gatesy:
|
And it wastes your whole day...
|
|
Yon and Scod:
|
It wastes your whole day...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
(Applause)
|
|
|
|
|
Gatesy:
|
Can you imagine the film clip to that song?
|