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Song in an Hour CD Lyrics

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05 - Eminem's Woobie
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08 - Kiedis 4 Moore 4 Eva
09 - Urine Town
10 - 21 Things I Don't Want in a Lover
11 - Much Too Skinny for the Army
12 - The Ballad of Floor Buffer Smurf
13 - Doctor Spoya
14 - Frankel's Lament




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Doctor Spoya

   
Gatesy: Okay...
Scod: Thanks for sticking around!
Gatesy: Now, the challenge was - there was Doctor Spoya...
Scod: Doctor Spoya... there was a Torana...
Gatesy: Yes... there was fish food...
Scod: Yes...
Gatesy: Epsom Salts...
Scod: Yep...
   
Audience member: Gangster rap...
Gatesy: Gangster rappin'!
Yon: Gangster rap...
   
Gatesy: Elvis kind of song... yeah, Elvis, we've said...
Yon: Elvis, we've said, well, we did it in an Elvis style, rather than putting Elvis in.
Gatesy: What else was there? A Torana...
   
Audience member: I said Elvis, I'm sorry...
   
Gatesy: No, no, no, no, no... Elvis is cool. Elvis is King!
   
Audience member: I'm sorry...
   
Scod: Elvis is King, in fact Elvis is the style in which we have chosen to do the entire song. So... well done...
Gatesy: I just want to know, I haven't missed anything...
Scod: Gangster rap... no, it's all there.
Gatesy: Okay, let's go.
Scod: Let's do it! Good luck everyone, good luck!
   
  Okay!
Gatesy: Thanks for sticking around for an hour, guys. We realise it's, you know, after bedtime.
Scod: Yeah...
   
  One! Two! Three!
   
Tripod: (Elvis) Oh lover,
Gatesy: I've been missing you so long.
Tripod: Can't recover,
Gatesy: So I have to sing this song.
Tripod: No other,
Gatesy: I'm dying from this long-distance love,
  Lover.
   
Tripod: Don't wanna,
Scod: Be without you any more.
Tripod: Was a gonna,
Scod: When you walked right out my door.
Tripod: No funn-er,
Scod: Wanna pack right up and go do a runner.
Tripod: In my Torana.
   
  Though we may poke out our pelvis,
  This bit isn't very Elvis-y.
   
  But this bit iiiiiiisssssssssss...
   
Scod: Don't need no banker or no lawyer,
Tripod: Don't need no naval destroyer,
  Don't need to loiter in no foyer,
  I'm far away from you,
  And every day I bleed,
  So won't you tell me what I need...
Scod: Doctor Spoya?
   
Tripod: I'm heartbroken,
Yon: I just can't concentrate.
Tripod: I'm not jokin',
Yon: I've made some terrible mistakes...
Tripod: ... since we've spoken.
Yon: I fed my favourite fish with Epsom Salts.
  Now they're chokin'.
   
Scod: Man, once I fed my fish with Epsom Salts, they're almost relaxed to death.
  Man, my fish are so chilled out, they're like gangster rappers.
  They're like Cyprus Hill fish.
   
Gatesy: (Gangster rapping) I was on a roll,
  Just swimmin' round my bowl.
  Put me in a weird mood,
  Epsom Salts in my food!
  Now I breakdance and I spin,
  With my flappy-flappy fins, and the...
   
  (Pause)
   
Yon: No!
Gatesy: That was good! They liked that!
  (Gangster rap) Yeah, all right. Thank you for coming round.
Yon: That is not how fish rap!
  Give me a beat...
Scod: How do fish rap?
Yon: I'll show ya...
   
Yon: Gurgle, gurgle, blubb, blubb, gurgle, gurgle...
   
Gatesy: Yeah, fine, thanks...
   
Tripod: (Elvis) Don't need no Janet or no Toya,
  Don't need no Bert or no Moira,
  You're my Helen of Troy-a,
  I'm far away from you,
  And every day I bleed,
  So won't you tell me what I need...
   
  Don't need no Huck Finn or Tom Sawyer,
  Don't need no Backstreet or no Boy-a,
  Don't need no H.G. or no Roy-a,
  I'm far away from you,
  And every day I bleed,
  So won't you tell me what I need...
   
Scod: Doctor...
Gatesy: Doctor...
Yon: Doctor...
   
Tripod: Doctor Spoya?
   
Gatesy: Thanks so much!
Yon: Yeah!
Scod: Thank you!

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