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"I have given you a husband. Go serve him on my behalf. Respect him and submit to him domestically. Remember! What you do to him you do to me (Matt 25:40). What you do for Him you do for Me."

"I have given you a helper to help run your home and meet your needs. Do not abuse her but love her as you love yourself and as I Love her. Remember! What you do to her you do to me, Remember also that you will have to give to me an account of how you treated your wife and family and honoured me in your home."

Marriage brings together two different people and they fit together somehow into a unity either under God or Satan.

If God brings you together and you develop the relationship under the guidance of The Holy Spirit it will be fitted together perfectly by Jesus

If you choose y our spouse this will not happen. It may after deliverance but not before. Jesus will do His best to fit you together by putting you through trials to do this and what happens as a result of these trials is up to the each spouse.

Make certain it is God’s Will that you marry or the joining will not be perfect.

I am a man and a little chauvinistic as I feel women are delicate flowers who should be cared for in the way God wants men to care for them. Jesus always had a very tender love for women and every godly man should have the same type of love for them that He did. Most men do not appropriately relate to women or correctly appreciate women in the way God wants them to. Women are made different to men with softer, gentler, more delicate characteristics and a different, more sensitive, emotional make–up and as result get steamrollered by men or made to conform to a masculine role of sorts.

God made male and female different and gave them different roles. A man’s purpose in a relationship with a woman is to treat her so that she can fulfil these roles and not to treat her like a fellow male.

Carry out His mandate to reproduce and populate the world

Reflect out spiritual relationship with Jesus as His family on earth which continues into heaven

To provide a safe, nurturing environment in which to raise children.

To mature us an prepare us for the way we will relate in heaven

To serve the purposes of The King of God here on earth

A conviction that God wants them to be married

An agreement to get married

An agreement for each partner to carry out the roles they have in the marriage

A lifetime commitment the relationship

An agreement to sort out as many relational problems before and during the marriage that they can (deliverance)

A need to do all they can to prepare for the logistics of the wedding and the marriage home

Jesus to be the lord of their lives so they will be one with Him and each other through the unity of The Holy Spirit to relate as God desires them too so that the Love of God and His ministry to others can flow through the marriage.

For both to be equally yoked because they are led by The Holy Spirit in all they do.

Marriage is a compromise, a melding of two individuals with different but complimentary character, abilities and gifts, both worldly and spiritual. The one commonality is The Holy Spirit leading them as a unit relating to each other as Jesus desires them too to do the work of The kingdom.

The work of the Kingdom can be ministering to each other, raising a Godly family, ministering to another or any of the mundane daily tasks they do as long as they are done out of love for Jesus to please Him either because you do it according to His principles and/or because He has asked you to do it for Him.

You can see how important it is to be led by the spirit so that both spouses are unified through their obedience to His guidance and direction.

Each partner of the marriage will need to give up things in part or whole for the marriage to succeed and the question which arises is: "What are you willing to give up for your marriage to be Godly and succeed?"

The man is steward of the wife, as she is a ‘good thing’ given to him by God to be his helpmeet and he should treasure her as such. He has the responsibility of looking after her (as something God has given him). He is responsible for meeting her emotional and physical needs and helping her, as much as he is able (under the guidance of The Holy Spirit), to reach her spiritual maturity. He also is to love her as Jesus Loves His church.

The husband is to respect the submission of his wife as he has been given to her by God to be her provider and protector and submits to him because Jesus has asked her to do so out of obedience to Him. For the husband to not respect the submission of the wife and be a good steward of her is a sin primarily against Jesus.

She is steward of the household responsibilities Jesus has given her (as part of her stewardship of her role as a helpmeet). She is to provide a loving, Godly, home environment for her husband and children to live in and for the children to be raised in.

Children are a gift from God. Parents are stewards of these gifts from God and should treasure them as such. They are to raise the children in a Godly Christ-centred environment so that the children will know how to follow Jesus and well as why they should follow Him.

Remember that headship is domestic and not spiritual or else you will destroy your wife by imposing on her that which belongs to Jesus (spiritual headship) and Satan will use this assumed headship as a legal right/access to slowly destroy the wife and her potential to serve Jesus.

Most people are taught wealth = security, love = sex, authority = power and self-value = prestige and recognition. This has crept into the worldly church so people now base their worth on these worldly values. Satan has engineered these values in society to destroy the Christian marriage and the church.

In the Western world both people in a marriage usually have to work to gain or keep their wealth and so the children are born later than they should, are usually placed with relatives or child care and as they grow older come home to an empty house and have to look after themselves. This means the systems Satan have set up – humanistic child care centres, TV with unchristian shows and relatives who do not know Jesus – influence a child most of the day.

The wife cannot do her role as homemaker and mother but takes on the role of a man – provider. Headship is usually out of place, God’s order in the family is altered, or is often minimal and often destroyed or badly crippled. Is it any wonder the children of the Western World are in such a mess?

Married couples use their own wisdom to keep their possessions and feel secure rather than relying on God’s security and wisdom. Their lives are second best to what God wants them to do so they do not reach the potential they otherwise could have in their service of Him.

The answer is to restore God’s order in the family no matter what the cost and trust Him for your needs. It is better to go to heaven poor than have wealth and security and go to hell.

Remember! Satan has control of the world. It is still his and he has engineered it to destroy Christianity and families. He succeeds when Christians follow a watered down materialistic faith, which is why so many Christian families are hurting and/or churches are dying and ineffective as they fall in line with Satan’s methods to market or administer themselves.

A wife can give up a lot to be married: the security of her family, her friends, her social life, her financial security (job) placing her income and provision under the man’s authority. Her independence, her church, her freedom (in a sense is placed under the domestic authority of another). This is why a man must love his wife, if only in appreciation of the sacrifices she has made to marry him.

When she has children she becomes tied to the house for up to 18 years minimum. Every part of her life is affected and parts are often curtailed.

Then there is the touching scene when husband comes home form work. Walks in the door, expecting her to be dressed like a model, romantic and ready for a great night of sex, the kids so well behaved they cause no trouble and look after themselves. She has had a day of fighting the dog and the washing machine, doing the housework, cleaning nappies and trying to organise the disaster area left after the kids have finished with it and wants husband to come home and say she is still beautiful and a capable housekeeper and good mother and appreciate the effort she has made that day. Any wonder she feels like a slave or used and he feels rejected.

A good husband is aware of his wife’s burdens and the demand on her and helps his wife to get time to herself so she can socialise without the children and unwind. He builds up her self-esteem and tells her she is still beautiful to him otherwise she may eventually desire another who tells her that. A good wife realises her husband needs to be appreciated for supporting her and children and keeping a roof over their head and tells him she appreciates this and tries to be romantic as necessary and occasionally have a favourite dish for tea just for him as she tells him lovingly.

Both spouses need to meet the needs of the other before their own if only to fulfil God’s Law of Love, let alone have a fruitful environment for God to work in and build up the marriage.

A good husband looks after his wife’s mental and spiritual health as well as her physical health as she often does not have time herself to prepare things in these areas. He will do what is necessary to give her the time she needs in these areas either to prepare them or attend to them.

The most important thing she has given up is herself, her rights to control her environment as the home she will live in is under the headship of her husband. She is a special gift from the Lord, a treasure He has entrusted the husband with which he must nurture and protect as a steward of this wonderful gift of a wife Gods has given him.

A wife will respond and trust a husband who loves her and treats her as God’s gift to him and gives (submits) himself to her to care for her every need (note: not greed).

It is really of little use to read this book unless both spouses are in a correct relationship with God and each other as that is the starting point for living in marriage as citizens of The kingdom of God. You will benefit from reading this book but not as much as you would have if the relationship with your spouse is not correctly in place. This is why the self-deliverance prayers at the front of this book are so important.

Problems in marriage usually occur because one spouse has been abused badly and has not been delivered of the effects of this abuse before they were married. This damage needs to be dealt with which is why it is suggested these deliverance prayers are prayed before the rest of the book is read (if they have not been prayed earlier).

Ideally, the affects of all previous abuse should be dealt with before marriage during the betrothal period or earlier and I encourage engaged couples to go through deliverance to remove the effects of past hurts before they are married.

Once these prayers are prayed then you should read the book together as a couple discussing what is in it and any problems that arise so that the unity of spirit required in a marriage is developed as you read.

THe prayers that follow are for married people. THee are prayers for single people at the beginning of the section on courtship and betrothal

Lord, I am a woman. You have made us different from men as You have different roles for us than You do for them.

I give You my womanhood, femininity, sexuality and, as applicable, my roles as a wife, homemaker, mother and partner in the past, present and future and all the ways I express what I am as a woman. I want to express this as You want me to and not as the world says I should.

I give you any headship submission I have had, have now or will have and I am sorry for anything I have done wrong in these any areas of my womanhood. I want You to be my spiritual Head. I also want to be able to fulfil my role of submitting properly to my husband or future husband as my domestic head.

Lord, I am a man. You have made us different from women as You have a different roles for us than you do for them.

I give You my manhood, masculinity, sexuality and, as applicable, roles as a husband, provider, father, partner and parent in the past, present and future and all the ways I express what I am as a man. I want to express this as You want me to and not as the world says I should.

I give You any headship role I have had, have now or will have and I am sorry for anything I have done wrong in this area as I want You to be my spiritual Head also I want to be able to love my wife as you want me to love her and to properly fulfil my Role as her domestic head.

I am sorry for the things I have done wrong in any areas of my manhood as I want to be the man You want me to be.

I give you my relationship with my spouse. Lord, I want all that is done with them; serving them, ministry, intimacy, sex, whatever we do as a couple to be based on Love, appreciation and thanksgiving for who they are in You. I am sorry for the wrong things I have done in these areas and ask You, Holy Ghost, to guide me in the area of relationship with my spouse

Lord, you are my betrothed. I love you and want to live as a faithful betrothed person I give you all my life, my future earthly marriage, my sorrows and problems, sadnesses, pain, finances all I am and have to hold for me and I thank You that You meet my needs in here and in heaven. I am sorry for anything I have one wrong in these areas and will try not to do them again out of love for you.

Lord, I want to be a good parent and raise my children the way you want me too. I am sorry for anything I have done wrong in this area and will try to do only what you want me to do as a parent. Show me how to discipline them in your Love and to guide them to be like you in all they do.

Lord Jesus, thank You for the gift of this child (name child) and ask you to guide and teach us how to love and nurture them and to teach them how to be your child to live as You want them to live. They are Yours Lord, so show us how to be good stewards of them and nurture them as you want us too.

Lord, I give you those areas of my life that deals with my reproduction cycle periods and pregnancy, now, in the future as well as future childbirth events I give me to you and know that the curse has been dealt with on the cross and broken there so in Jesus name I command every demon enforcing this curse to go immediately and not return.

Satan, you no longer have a right to work in these areas as I have given them to Jesus, so in Jesus’ Name go the the abyss.

In Jesus’ Name I command complete healing and restoration of all the damage Satan did to me as well as and integration of every part of my being and personality .

I ask You Jesus to fill me afresh with The Holy Spirit and me anoint as You think I need to be to serve you.