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The Italian Job	RANK=717
Category : Action Description : A band of thieves plan to steal 35 million dollars worth of gold bars in Venice, Italy. The cast is star-encrusted. So many eminent cinema greats, each ideally suited to their character. Jason Statham as the resident charmer and main getwate driver (should that be main Transporter?) Mark Wahlberg is on familiar ground as the head of the pack, as in The Big Hit. Seth Green fills the ace hacker boots nicely, and although he has to suffer hollywoodized computer screens, his performance is suitably midway between enthusiastic and nerdy. Ed Norton spits and sneers admirably throughout. Charlize Theron might be a good actor but her visual qualities are too distracting to allow a proper examination. Further, in this movie her character has her credibility practically assassinated by some serious oversight in the script whereby her entire motivation is called into question long after it has already been used to justify half of the movie. I bet the director was hoping no one would notice, but he was wrong. If Angelina Jolie and Ashely Judd have any competition it's from Chalize Theron, since she looks similar and gets similar parts, except her initials are not A.J. The heists are quite clever. The only two main things let the movie down. Firstly is the problem with Theron's character (outlined above). Secondly the title of the movie is misleading, since only the first 15 minutes take place in Italy and the rest is in the USA. I noticed an "easter egg" in the movie: Theron's character is a legitimate safe cracker working for the police, and after opening a safe she declares that she "never looks inside", just as Jason Statham said he never looked inside the packages when he was Transporting them. There may be more links to other movies that the main actors were in but I wasn't looking closely.	Viewing Status #viewings=1 First seen in 10/2003

The Jackal (1998)	RANK=204
Category : Action Description : A poor remake of the original (which I haven't seen so I'm just taking other critics' word on that). Bruce Willis is Carlos The Jackal - a terrorist who manages to get a very large and high powered gattling gun built so that he can blow away the US First Lady. Not bad.	Viewing Status #viewings=1 First seen in /1998

Jackie Brown	RANK=22
Category : Not Sure Description : Tarantino can make spectacular movies, and, as Jackie Brown proves, he can also make spectacularly BAD movies. A plot I didn't care about, a script that manages to make even big-name actors look out-of-place, and all accompanied by music that is so unbelievably annoying that I'm surprised the OFLC didn't insist that explicit lyrics be ADDED to the music before its Australian release. God DAMN I hated this movie. (Sorry Dan, but the hate is permanently etched into my brain and none of your arguments will change that.)	Viewing Status #viewings=1 First seen in 4/1998

K-PAX	RANK=861
Category : Not Sure Description : Hmmmmmmm. Hmmmmmmmmmmm. Mmmmm. Hmm? Hmm. Mmmmmmmm. Hmm! Mmmmmmmmmm! Hmmmmm. I love a movie that pokes my intellect. It leaves you wondering "Was he...?" Can't give too much away without spoiling it really. I do very much encourage you to give this film a red hot go. Just be warned, if you didn't like Contact or Powder then you're probably not deep enough to like this one either.	Viewing Status #viewings=1 First seen in 3/2002

The Kiss of the Dragon	RANK=804
Category : Action Description : This film just doesn't let up. It does not disappoint. This is not like the other big budget martial arts flicks of recent years - it's better. Jet Li co-wrote the movie (as well as starring) and has bestowed upon the film a pleasantly unusual combination of characters, location and dialogue. The premise of the movie is not revealed at the beginning, meaning that you are more intrigued by early events than if you had guessed half the story already. Bonus points there, Jet. And for that reason I will not reveal the premise either :-) . Suffice to say that Jet plays a top Chinese cop who quickly finds himself the target of corrupt Paris policemen. Bridget Fonda appears as prostitute under the control of the crook's leader, Richard - played by one of France's most celebrated actors (the guy who was Nikita's boss, gee I forget his name). The attention given to the bad guys is nearly as detailed as the attention given to Jet and Fonda, and add to this the fact that some of the French bad dudes give Jet Li a serious arse-whooping before they croak it, and you have highly engrossing fight scenes that make you think the bad guy doesn't deserve to lose! There are some nitpick candidates; Jet's acting style, if he has one, is decidedly understated. He's definitely the strong silent type! He could be the Chinese version of Schwarzneggar - except Arnie never had moves on him like Jet Li does. Not actually a problem, but you sometimes wish he'd break out of his shell. Also, there is some lack of believability in how quickly Fonda recovers from a heroin injection, but since my only knowledge of such things comes from what I've seen in movies, this also might not actually be a problem. That said, there are some excellent advantages this film has over others in its genre. The first innovation is that Jet sports a solid supply of some coloured accupuncture needles that he deftly places at the appropriate chi points of people to achieve a variety of effects, and he uses this power for both harm and help. A nice poetic touch. Secondly, the female, (Fonda plays the only female character in the movie) is NOT the love interest of the Hero! Yes! Amazing! Take that Hollywood scum! hah! Lastly, the method by which the relationship is developed between Jet and Fonda is (pleasingly) gradual, and doesn't happen straight out from the moment they meet. Instead there are intervening times and events before their destiny is interlocked. I had some initial trepidation over whether Jet Li would prostitute himself in the manner that Jackie Chan has done recently in Rush Hour 2. I am happy to say this fear did not eventuate. Well worth a look.	Viewing Status #viewings=1 First seen in 10/2001

Ladyhawk	RANK=9
Category : Romance Description : Some lame movie about a medieval mercenary that somehow finds some hawk that can turn into a woman. The only notable thing about the movie is that the Ladyhawk is played by Michelle Pfieffer. There's an annoying kid involved too. Guaranteed to bore the pants off ya.	Viewing Status #viewings=1 First seen in /1993

The Last Samurai	RANK=965
Category : Not Sure Description : Few movies have ever distilled the essence of what is wrong with the western world so clearly as The Last Samurai. Few movies with production values as large as this have reached so deep into the core of ourselves and delivered a cohesive and believable lesson on humanity with such resonance and sadness. The story is set in Japan in 1874 during a time of great societal change in which the feudal system of warlords and the Emperor is being federated into a Westernized system of laws and government. Japanese reformists aim to eradicate the samurai warriors who are resisting the change and who are now seen as rebels. The narrative follows the life of an American army captain comissioned by the reformists to train a western-style army with firearms to defeat the samurai. Captain Aldridge (played by Tom Cruise) is disillusioned by the fate of the thousands of American indians recently slaughtered by his own army, but having no other income he accepts the Japanese offer. During the first battle against the Samurai he is captured and kept alive so that the Samurai leader may learn about their enemy. The Samurai general Katsumoto (played powerfully by Ken Watanabe) attempts to engage Aldridge in conversations (in English) during his preparation for the inevitable war ahead. The relationship between Aldridge and Katsumoto develops wonderfully through the film as Aldridge learns about Japanese life, and in particular the way of the Samurai. Strength, honour, discipline, these are the way of the Samurai. The courage and nobility of fighting sword-to-sword and face-to-face is shown in diametric contrast to the dispassion and relative cowardice of machine guns. Above all the unswaying semi-religious comittment to serving the Emperor is depicted as an immensely positive core value of the Samurai. To reconcile this treatment of the old ways with the realities of today and my own moral code is extraordinarily difficult. It is, on the one hand, so easy to flip the coin around and recast the samurai as violent warmongering savages standing in the way of change and resisting the erosion of their power and respect. It seems their entire existence is predicated on the odius notion that disputes must be settled through violence and bloodshed. Yet, while change must occur, no single change is inevitable. The Samurai stood for something which, because of this movie, I find deeply impressive. It's difficult to describe. It comes in drips and drops throughout the movie, but perhaps the samurai practice of ritual suicide in the face of defeat is the ultimate example of what is so impressive about this lost culture. It's about the utter selflessness of the Samurai code - the belief that there are principles worth dying for. Above all, the discipline and ritual of that culture coud greatly benefit both myself and the whole western world if only we would take notice. The Emperor, weak and hesitant to act at first, eventually resolves the dilemma in the only way he can, although our knowlegde of Japan's later history puts a bit of dampener on the scene of the resolution. The script is excellent for an American production. Camera work is right on target. The best actor is undoubtedly Ken Watanabe. The film was destined for greatness in part because of Cruise's name in the credits, but mainly because it shows us a glimpse of a simpler life that we sometimes wish we had - and a glimpse inside ourselves of something important we've all lost. Without spoiling too much, if there is one sentence which sums up the tension of the whole movie it is surely when Aldridge is asked why he will fight the federal army if they ever attack the Samurai village: "Because they have come to destroy what I have come to love."	Viewing Status #viewings=1 First seen in 2/2004

Legally Blonde	RANK=270
Category : Comedy Description : Ahh, Reese. Da `Spoon. Soak up the Reeseness of this girl-on-top teen flick. Flightly blonde named Elle gets dumped by her boyfriend because she would be a setback to his political aspirations. She vows to win him back by getting into the same law school as he. The plot is then given a standard against-the-odds treatment, and we are supposed to wonder if Elle can save the day. Kind of like a blend between Clueless, Never Been Kissed, and Road Trip. If you're not into Miss Witherspoon then you're in for a very mixed bag. The movie begins with what has been rumoured by some as being the movie opening sequence with the greatest number of bouncy college girls that has even been put on film. I can't verify that claim, but it's difficult to disagree. By all means, leave after the first 15 minutes if really have to. From then on the pace slows to a crawl and if I had to name the worst characteristic of this film it is that it is methodical and slow for most of the way. The ending is something that I really could have seen coming had I had my brain in gear, but as you can tell the opening sequence left me in no fit state for making accurate plot predictions. Ha! The Perm Defence! Spare me.	Viewing Status #viewings=1 First seen in 11/2001

Lethal Weapon 4	RANK=135
Category : Action Description : Which Lethal Weapon was this? (!) Oh, yeah, that's right. This is the one with the flamethrowing Uzi psycho and the boat full of illegal immigrants and the fast-talking detective that wants Roger's daughter, and where Riggs is always playing jokes on his partner. Yeah, Mel and Danny got back together for one last hurrah. I am very certain that this will be the last LW movie. God I hope so.	Viewing Status #viewings=1 First seen in 9/1998

Liar Liar	RANK=226
Category : Comedy Description : Jim Carrey does his usual stuff as a lawyer who is forced to tell the truth for 1 day. There's a few funny moments, but if you don't like Jim Carrey (yes, there are people like that), then don't see this.	Viewing Status #viewings=1 First seen in /1997

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