Winter 2004 FINAL Grade 4

Final: CACC STICKYS v NEWTOWN BLUEBAGS. Aug 28 at Parkes Drive.

Toss won CACC by who batted.

Summary: CACC 6 - 264 (36 overs) d Newtown 8-98 (all out) (18 overs)

CACC STICKYS
score
how out
4s
6s
overs
mdns
wkts
runs
catches
stmp

1. Greg DUFFY (c)

44
n.o
4
1
-
-
-
-
.
.

2. Matt BROCK

45
n.o
6
-
2
0
1
4
-
.

3. Varun SETH

30
c? b
5
1
4
2
0
7
-
.

4. Craig ILOTT

23
b
3
-
-
-
-
-
1
.

5. James BURRELL (wkr)

36
b
4
-
-
-
-
-
1
.

6. Dave KING

9
b
1
-
2
0
1
5
2
.

7. Alex NEWMAN

42
n.o
4
2
3
0
0
38
-
.

8. Jeremy HOLLAND

10
b
-
-
3
0
2
19
.
.

9. Steve LeMARQUAND

1
b
-
-
4
0
3
21
.
.

Sundries 11b 8lb 2w 3nb

24
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
.
.

TOTAL : 6 for 264 after 36 overs

264
-
27
4
18
-
7 + r.o
-
.
.

NEWTOWN BLUEBAGS
score
how out
4s
6s
overs
mdns
wkts
runs
catches
stmp

1. Dean VANDINE

6
b9
1
-
6
0
2
31
-
-

2. Craig MURPHY

13
b9
3
-
3
0
1
32
-
-

3. Chris OLSEN

16
b9
2
1
6
0
0
49
-

4. Dean JOHNSON

46
c4 b6
4
1
3
0
1
27
-
-

5. Hamit DINCLIK

1
c5 b8
-
-
6
0
0
34
-

6. Mat SHEPHERD

5
c6 b8
1
-
-
-
-
-
-
-

7. Gary VANDINE

6
c6 b2
-
-
6
0
1
39
-
-

8. Scott McLEOD

0
r.o.
-
-
6
0
1
44
-
-

9. -

-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-

Sundries 2b 2lb 0w 1nb

10
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-

TOTAL : 8 (all out) for 98 in 18 ov.

98
-
11
2
36
0
6
-
-
-
 

Report:
I arrived to see a couple of twitchy fast bowlers, inert all-rounders, alert reserves and no top order, so of course I won the toss and elected to bat. I asked Slem to call Number 3 Ilott (aka Cap'n Drink'n'drive) and De Niro to call Sanchez (No. 4) and find out where my opening partner Verunder Sethwag was as I padded up with 5 minutes to game time. Slem reported that Drink'n'drive was pissed. "Don't you mean hungover?" (his usual big game preparation). "No pissed off his head and stumbling down the street trying to find Centennial Park". De Niro reported that Sanchez and Sethwag were caught in a navy-induced traffic jam in Bondi. So I told the Knife Brock to pad up, which is like asking a fat kid if he'd like fries with that thickshake. Out we strode to take on the Newtown Bluebags (aka Pudgetown Windbags), as I could spy this derro staggering out of the bushes singing to himself...yes, our number 3 Drink'n'drive. My instructions to Brocky were to hang around long enough for Ilott to sober up....but we've only got 36 overs!

I need not have worried cos The Knife carved the bowling all over the plate and served up a lovely 40 not out with a jus of taragon and arrogance, while I scratched around like a battery hen waiting to be slaughtered. Luckily Verunder Sethwag (The V8) had arrived by now and strode out as Ilott tried to put batting gloves on his feet. As usual I told V8 to take his time and have a look at the bowling, he smiled and muttered something in Hindi which I now know meant, "Fat chance buddy! Watch these balls fly!" In a spray of 4's and 6's, V8 managed to shut the Windbags up, until I stumbled back on strike, where I was greeted with "have a go you Limp-wristed, perfumed, permed poofter". To which I retorted "It's not permed, so there". V8 skied one and the Windbags complained that someone driving past on Anzac Parade had yelled out to drop it and that was our fault and bad sportsmanship. I told them I couldn't help it if everyone in the world hated them. Mercifully I retired on 40, Drink'n'drive (23) did an impersonation of a batsman that was not wholly convincing (more on that later), Sanchez Burrell came smashing back into form with a blistering 36, Scarface Newman unloaded his trademark Malikalishnakov ammunition of 4's and 6's to a blistering 42 not out before The Knife (45no) and The Colonel (44no) came back briefly and we settled for a healthy 264 as the Windbags popped their own balloons.

As has been the case all season, the CACC bowlers muscled up and intimidated the hapless batsmen from ball one. The Windbags went the swing and Slem (3-21) cleaned up the stumps of the top three in his first 3 overs, and that was pretty much it. One particularly podgy windybag managed to smite a few boundaries, but at the other end The Dutch Oven (2-19) roasted a couple with his deceptive slower ball, V8 strangled their slasher (0-7 off 4), The Knife (1-4) cooked up a catch to the Sticky King and in fitting fashion, the Lollyman induced the podgy to swing (and the fat lady to sing) as the now familiar 'caught Ilott, bowled King' rounded out the Victory by 166 runs!

Sticky Moment: Cap'n Drink'n'drive strolling to the wicket at the non-striker's end after the V8 got out, trying to pretend that he was now sober for his agitated captain who played out the over and met Drink'n'drive for the strategic mid-pitch discussion. The skipper asked him how he was feeling, and he replied "fine" and then he asked why the last over had only been 3 balls long? The Skipper reminded him that V8 had faced the other 3 balls before getting out, which then allowed Drink'n'drive to come in to bat....it all went downhill from there....

I would like to thank everyone who played for the CACC Stickys this season, especially those guys who missed out on playing in the final, because you were the reason that we made it to the GF - Maverick, De Niro, The Rock and Shey. Thanks must also got to our keenest supporters - Pippa who backed us thru the finals when the pressure was really on, and Shydon who attended just about every game and seriously screwed with the minds of the opposition by taking a dump on the ground before play!

But no club succeeds without the tireless efforts of one person and the man who is the heart of the CACC and keeps the blood flowing to rest of its extremities, is John Harvey, who deals with the association, runs training, keeps the kit together and the bats glued, does the scoresheets and stats, writes the match reports, maintains and updates the website, drives players to grounds, umpires, is the team's wicket-keeper and bats like the legendary Arthur Morris, and this club would not have survived and prospered without him.....so if you haven't thanked The Rock Harvey today, you're a selfish bastard and get on the blower NOW!

As always it's been a pleasure ordering you around all season, and amazingly watching you do what I asked....so I look forward to playing with you next season when we go for Three in a Row!!!

Yours In Delirium,

Colonel GDuffy