APRIL 2006
Sunday 30 April 2006
Today started with all optimism but descended into technical problems and weariness at 2RRR.  Arrived at RRR and began to set up to record the 8 hour tape.  When Mistress Hellen went to adjust my chair she suddenly yelled and pulled her hand back, holding out fingers that had something that looked like snot stuck to one of them.  She said that whatever it was felt cold, very slimy and we both agreed it definitely *looked* like snot.

We both peered under the chair, and there it was, a big smear of *something* right by the adjustment lever on the underside of the chair.  How GROSS!!!!!

Understandably cross and grossed out, Mistress Hellen stomped off to wash her hands while I pushed the offending chair out of the way and found a different one.  Considering that whatever the substance was, it was still wet - one can only wonder if the people using the studio a mere 30 minutes before us had left the stuff there, thinking it wouldn't be discovered.  Or maybe as some sort of statement.

This turned out to be the least of our hitches.  The VCR turned out to be slightly demon possessed - not rewinding, not recording properly.  After a good deal of testing and trying to figure out what was wrong, Mistress Hellen went to power it off and then on again - couldn't find where it was plugged in, and managed to dislodge the plug from the hidden powerboard.  She rang PaulEJ, our technical buddy at RRR and he advised us to remove the back panel of the shelving to get access to the powerboard.

Nothing like a bit of studio dismantling to cheer one's spirit.

With the VCR now working, but not happy, we started taping.  Unfortunately I was a bit vocal about the snot and the VCR not working, and we decided at 40 minutes into the tape to start taping again.  By this time, we were 2 hours behind schedule and I was getting very weary.

The second attempt at recording was going well for a while, but my heart wasn't in it.  A few times I suggested that we pack up and come back another day, but Mistress Hellen said we'd be right - until about hour 6, when even she was flagging in energy and enthusiasm.  This was made worse by the fact I still hadn't gathered the CDs required for my show the next morning.

Finally, at 10:45pm we were able to hand over our newly created tape to the on air announcer and say proudly that he could put this one to air at 11pm.  Off home we went, but on the way home we both agreed that we'd like to redo the tape on a day when we felt more enthusiastic.

By the time we got home, an OLD tape of mine was playing on 2RRR.  This was slightly disturbing, making us suspicious that something awful had happened to the new one, and feeling that perhaps it was good that we'd already decided to re-record.  I went off to bed knowing that in the morning we'd be back at 2RRR for 'Down Memory Lane' and we'd find out what happened to the tape.

Saturday 29 April 2006
A very social morning - Jenni stayed the night and we launched out for a great walk in the morning.  Caught up with some canine friends I don't normally see.  Showed Jenni all my favourite bits of the park.

Michael, Courtney and a friend of Courtney called Mouse arrived while Jenni was packing the car for her departure.  These three are going off with Mistress Hellen for a day in the city.

I spent the day finishing the show plan for tomorrow's 8 hour tape recording session.  Of course, I also gathered all the CDs I needed and made a list of what muchie things I wanted Mistress Hellen to pack for the day.

Friday 28 April 2006
Another uneventful day - as far as I can remember.  I have made the mistake of not writing in this diary every day.  Silly me!  So I'm probably forgetting all sorts of exciting things that should be recorded for later amusement.

Jenni visited in the evening.  She and Mistress Hellen went on off for a night on the town.  I spent some time watching the fish again.  I love it when they think I'm going to feed them (which I never do - it's not my job - my job is to clean my nose prints off the glass) and they cluster around the front of the tank staring at me.

Thursday 27 April 2006
I don't recall ever mentioning that we now have a swarm of bees living in the backyard.  I find it safer to watch them from a distance.  They're in the wall of the outside toilet - and it's funny to go in there and hear the whole structure buzzing.

This outside toilet is not somewhere I do go usually, as any time I've investigated the place, it's been grotty and filled with spiders and their webs and nothing of interest.  There's not usually any water in the bowl either - so I can't even get a drink from in there.

No-one in the household normally visits this wasteland - except now - in fact, we've visited the room more in the last few months than anyone has in the last umteen number of years - we go in just to listen to the bees!

This need to go and goof with the bees has made it necessary to clean out 'the little room', and make it less of a spider web death trap.

Anyway, I usually observe the bees from the safety of inside the house - perched on Command and Observation Post 1.  There's so many of them!

Wednesday 26 April 2006
More Health Hazard Games with Mistress Hellen.  Yolande visited but didn't bring Buck.  He's the dalmation with the tail that can chop down strong trees - you really have to watch him when he's happy, make sure you don't get injured by his tail wagging.  Anyway, where was I?  Oh yes - the three of us went out for a walk and ended up strolling the shores of a bay on the Parramatta River.  Mistress Hellen, being her adventurous self, launched out on to the mud and slime covered rocks, declaring how slippery they could be and how one needs to be careful - about 1/2 a second before ending up on her hands and knees in the mud.

Fortunately she saw the funny side - as we all did.  Of course, the problem with falling into mud is getting out of the situation again without having to inch your way on your hands and knees.  I'm glad Yolande was there to haul Mistress H to safety.  I must say though, it's a good thing she wears the sort of clothes she does (ie. completely covered from head to toe), or things could have been very nasty. As it is, she has an impressive mashed bit on her leg and some sinister cuts on her hand.

Tuesday 25 April 2006 Anzac Day
Very low key today - visited zeRellies where the humans indulged in more chair glueing, or is that gluing?  I kept Matilda company as she doesn't like it when all the humans go outside and leave her alone.  What a sook she can be at times.

Matilda showed me one of her favourite games - if Mistress Elizabeth opens a new box of washing powder, Matilda gets the cardboard strip and then takes it to Mister Darron and just pesters him with it.  It was great watching her bugging Mister Darron.

I do rather like the way Matilda likes carrying things around the house - she's quite a hoot most of the time.

We then played chasings round the house and then found nice warm places to rest for a while.  Watched some of the Anzac Parade before falling asleep.

Monday 24 April 2006
Another great show.  Have booked myself in for next Sunday to record another 8 hour tape - this one's called 'Howling at the Moon'.  I love doing long tapes.

I have been continuing my observation of the birdlife in the garden.  We seem to have more than usual.  This means I have to be ultra careful not to annoy them - or Mistress Hellen will be cross with me.  I've pointed out to her that my natural tendency is to hunt things - but she insists I'm able to overcome this urge.

Sunday 23 April 2006 St George's Day
Woke to find Mistress Hellen being industrious and getting ready for an outing.  We went to the Central Coast for a bit of different scenery.  Bought some more plants for the garden - well, she did, not me.

On our return I was outraged to see a cat - yes a CAT - asleep in our carport.  What a cheek!!!  This is the same cat that was sleeping peacefully at the bottom of the garden the other day.  Hrrumph!!!

Saturday 22 April 2006
Dilys took Mistress Hellen out for her birthday - I know, her birthday was in February, but the two of them just hadn't managed to get organised to 'do lunch' before now.  I stayed behind at Dilys' place and hung out with Chelsea.  Discussed the fact that our local parks don't have much water in them anymore.  Well, it's more that they used to have no water, but with some rain, they get mud puddles, which always leads to us being in trouble for playing in the mud, rather than just getting wet in free flowing creeks.

Chelsea told me that the other day she was in big bikkies trouble for going into some really yurky water - she was hosed off by Dilys and the next day had to have a full proper bath.  We go to different parks for our playtime, a bit like human children going to neighbouring schools.

Thursday 20 April 2006
I think we've finally cleaned up from the BunFest.

We've been visiting the park at different times lately so I've been meeting new friends.  It's such a great place to socialise, for both humans and dogs.

In our nightly walks, around the streets, I've noticed that there seems to be huge amounts of potential firewood lying on nature strips, as if everyone in the area is chopping down huge trees.  Both of us are surprised that we don't encounter people loading this wood into trailers and hauling it off home to store for next winter.  I know there are a few folk around here with wood fires in the house - I can see the smoke on cold days.

This started a discussion about how people don't have room to store things like this and would probably rather just fork out money and buy wood as required.  Or maybe they're just too lazy.  Don't get us started on how people whine about being unable to afford things and then don't make any effort to economise!

Sunday 16 April 2006 Easter Sunday and BunFest Day
Lots of happy tail wagging and joyous barking today.  Visitors everywhere, lots of yummy Easter Buns to eat and other lovely things.  It was great catching up with all our human friends.  The festivities went long into the night, with the last guests departing after midnight - not bad for a gathering that started at 1:00pm.

Saturday 15 April 2006
Spent the day assisting with getting organised for the BunFest tomorrow.  I carried a lot of stuff to the back door that will be used outside during the festivities - rugs, art equipment, cushions, that sort of stuff.  Also helped by tidying away all my CDs and making sure there wasn't anything silly lying about for folk to fall over.

Mistress Hellen finally triumphed over the TV Channel assignments - and we're almost back to normal.  A few minor adjustments and I'll maybe be back in her good books again.  It's not that we use the TV much, which makes it even more annoying having to spend so much time getting the thing set up again.

Friday 14 April 2006 - Good Friday
Finally making progress towards getting our dining room chairs back.  Without any chairs at all in the dining room I am deprived of the view from Command and Observation Post 3.  In fact, one of them IS command and Observation Post 3.

Yes, back to the chairs - the humans, all working together, took over 2 hours to disassemble, clean and then reassemble one chair - that's ONE chair.  I asked if we could take it home so I could see out the window again.  Mistress Hellen said she hadn't realised I was missing the view so much - so she'd get a spare old chair from the garage for me until the entire set of fixed chairs came home again.

Watched again while Mistress Hellen struggled with this TV channel reprogramming.  I must say that having acquired Channel 31 - what I've seen so far wasn't worth the trouble I'm in!  I hope future viewing proves the trouble worthwhile.

Thursday 13 April 2006
The Out-Of-Town visitors arrived and were most pleased to be lunching on the dining room floor.  Not a problem at all.  Diane, Bill and their children, John and Teresa were good company.  I always enjoy meeting Mistress Hellen's friends from years ago - those I only know of by way of stories and hearing their letters.

After the visitors left, we indulged in more gardening, this time planting silver beet.  When I commented that these teeny plants weren't silver, Mistress Hellen agreed and then warned me against commenting on their lack of rhythm.  *pause*  Took a few moments to sink in what that meant.  Oh - Ho Ho Ho to you too, Mistress H.

I am in trouble for fiddling with the TV remote and messing up all the channel assignments.  I wanted to find Channel 31 and asked the TV to scan for it - unfortunately it reassigned all the channels to different buttons.  Spent a considerable amount of time looking suitably repentant while Mistress Hellen tried, without success, to reprogram things to the correct place again.

Wednesday 12 April 2006
Assisted Mistress Hellen with more gardening.

We have visitors from Out-Of-Town coming tomorrow - and it looks like lunch will be served on the dining room floor as the dining room chairs are still at zeRellies.  Mistress Hellen hasn't seen these folk face to face for years and so she's very excited about this visit.

Saturday 8 April 2006
Another day in paradise, and I can't remember what I did - which serves me right for not updating this diary more often.

Friday 7 April 2006
The Easter Show begins - oh goodie - this means I get to howl and behave like something possessed at 9pm each night when the fireworks go off.

Mistress Hellen has decided we'll have another Bun Fest this year - an almost annual event when humans come on along and eat too many Easter Buns and drink too much tea, coffee or other things.  We're working on the details and constructing a list of possible attendees.

Oh, Mistress Hellen took the chairs to zeRellies last night after being out and about - thought you'd like to know.  The excercise of gluing them together has yet to be scheduled.

Wednesday 5 April 2006
We were supposed to be visiting zeRellies and taking all the dining room chairs over so they could be reglued and be less of a health hazard in the house.  I was much impressed by the skill displayed by Mistress Hellen in fitting 5 chairs into the car - and still have room for me!

Unfortunately, we left our journey a little too late and became stuck in some awful peak hour traffic, caused by some mishaps on both roads leading west.  So we turned around and came home.  The task of unloading the car seemed pointless, so the chairs are now resting comfortably in the car for the night.  Tomorrow we'll head over there before peak hour.

On our walk tonight we spotted a Tawny Frog Mouth sitting watching the world from overhead cables - so we stopped and watched it watching.  This went on for a few minutes, with us hoping the locals wouldn't come out and take umbrage at us lurking in front of their house.  Then the bird spotted something and took off - and from my angle it looked for all the world like it went right through the front door of the house opposite.  Let's hope that was just an optical illusion and not reason for bird and human(s) to be distressed.

Monday 3 April 2006
Continuing my observing of the King Parrots.  Also still watching the fish.  It's suddenly become my job to keep the front of the tank clean (the outside of the front, I should point out) as I seem to always be pushing my nose against the glass and leaving beagle nose prints.

Tonight we noticed the street lights have gone missing again.  Almost gave the night walk a miss but we decided to brave it.

Saturday 1 April 2006
Mistress Hellen returned from shopping with some plants for the garden.  I like gardening because I get to dig the holes.  Apart from that, I can't remember much about what I did that day because it's been so long since I wrote in the diary - I'm way behind for April.

Oh yes - been watching King Parrots that have made themselves at home in the garden.  Also watching Mistress Hellen trying to photograph these creatures - but they aren't as confident as other birds.  Whereas your average Rainbow Lorrikeet will practically perch on your head if it thinks there's food to be had - these King Parrots scamper when they think you're getting within photographing distance.

The Beagle Diary
A fascinating (perhaps) insight into Streamer's life with and without Mistress Hellen.  The diary is updated frequently.