Home Topics Index Download
Transcript 265B — Gaining Victory Over Masturbation
HC: Good evening. Welcome to Open Forum.
CALLER: My question has to do with masturbation. In Matthew 5:30, when Jesus talks about, "If thy right hand offend thee, cut it off," is He referring to masturbation? And is that what you were talking about, that God had provided to an unmarried person, that he may have a fulfilled life? And is masturbation for an individual a sin?
HC: The problem is raised concerning the act of masturbation, and whether that is a sin. You see, ordinarily, in this kind of an act, in order to obtain any enjoyment from it, it requires that the person doing it is thinking lustful thoughts. Now the Bible teaches that if a man lusts after a woman, he has already committed adultery. And therefore that kind of an act is very sinful. It is just as much a sinful act as the act of adultery, because it requires sinful thoughts in order to be accomplished.
Now when the Bible talks about blessings for the single person, God is completely aware, of course, that we have these desires in our bodies, that we're designed the way we are. But God also is aware that we can live without expressing those desires, or catering to those desires. And that is where the Bible and the secular world part company, because the secular world pretty much has decided, beginning with Freud and others, that the sexual act is one of the cornerstones of our life, that it is one of the things that must have expression in order to enjoy any kind of a happy life.
But God certainly doesn't intimate that that is so. That is not true. Man can enjoy happy and fruitful and joyful life without exercising any sexual prerogatives, that is, by living a life in which the sexual desires are completely subjugated.
Now the true blessing that comes to the person who is living singly is not in this area at all. We read in verse 32 of I Corinthians 7: "The unmarried man is anxious about the affairs of the Lord, how to please the Lord." This is where he gets his happiness, you see, living to God's glory, not how to cater to his own lustful desires, but how to please the Lord. "But the married man is anxious about worldly affairs, how to please his wife." So his interests are divided. "And the unmarried woman is anxious about the affairs of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly affairs, how to please her husband." So you see, the blessing comes in an entirely different area than sexual desires.
CALLER: I see. Well, occasionally it seems that I do gain victory over my sexual desires, by diverting my attention to working with my hands, washing the dishes or something. But then at the time that I weaken, and I succumb to my desire, then I feel that I have sinned, and I kind of want to blame it on Christ Jesus for allowing it, if it's wrong, or feel that He sanctioned it, if I go ahead and do it. But I never have the peace about doing it next time, that it's the right thing to do. And I find this with a lot of things in my life. And I'm not sure that I'm not saying that what is wrong is right, and what is right is wrong.
HC: You're being very candid. You're starting to be very honest with yourself, and that's very helpful. You see, you will find that this sin, as with many sins, begins in your mind. It doesn't just suddenly become full blown desire, does it? It begins in your mind. You begin to think about sexual desire of some kind. And then you begin to let it develop in your mind, and you begin to play with it in your mind. And so pretty soon the action begins.
If you've decided you aren't going to smoke cigarettes for a while, you'll find that you'll be drinking your cup of coffee, or whatever you normally do when you reach for a cigarette, and you'll begin to think how good a smoke will be. And because you're trying to repent of it, you'll first resist it. But then you'll keep playing with it in your mind. You'll coddle it in your mind, and fondle it in your mind. And the next thing you think is, "It's just too big for me. I've got to go out and get a cigarette, even though I've got to drive ten miles to get a pack."
You've allowed it to become a very big force in your mind. This is characteristic of all kinds of sin. Now the place to stop it is right there where it began, in your mind. First of all, you've got to come to truth with yourself that this is sin, whatever it may be. "This is an act of rebellion against God. Now I believe that I'm a child of God. Therefore the Bible teaches I'm not in bondage to sin. I'm not under the power of Satan in any way. And if I'm going to succumb to this sin, it's my action. I can't blame anybody else. I have decided for the moment that to serve Christ as Lord is too big for me. I'm going to spit in His eye. I'm going to do my own thing, because I like this sin that much."
Now we've got to look at this sin this way. Now recognizing that it is an act of open rebellion of course horrifies us. "How can I do this? How can I live this way if Christ is my Savior?"
And so the moment the desire comes into our mind, we've got to begin to cry out, "Oh Father, have mercy on me. I don't want to sin anymore. I don't want to go in that direction anymore." And we start reading the Bible, or as you say, start doing the dishes, or start running around the block, or get busy with anything, preferable getting into the Word, so that that sin cannot continue in your mind. But if you let it fester there, and if you keep coming back to it, pretty soon it's going to get so big that you'll fall again. And then you'll have all the frustration and the trauma, the feeling of uneasiness, the feeling of defeat, that always follows.
CALLER: Does the scripture that says, "God's strength is made perfect in weakness" have anything to do with my situation?
HC: No, because the context of that verse is speaking about something altogether different. You see, the context of that verse is II Corinthians 12, where Paul, under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, is talking about the "thorn in the flesh," a messenger of Satan to buffet him.
Well, what is that thorn in the flesh? It cannot be a physical weakness, or a sin problem in his flesh, because he is not under the power of Satan. He is a child of God. You are not under the power of Satan, either, if you're a born again believer. You're a child of God. Your flesh will strive to sin, because your body is still not saved. But you're not under the power of Satan.
But the "thorn in the flesh," we know from Numbers 33:55, is the pressures from the outside, from those who are unsaved, who harass Paul, and seek to make life difficult for him. In Numbers 33:55 we read, where God is talking to Israel: "But if you do not drive out the inhabitants of the land from before you, then those of them whom you let remain shall be as pricks in your eyes and thorns in your sides. And they shall trouble you in the land where you dwell." And this is exactly what happened. The Philistines that were left alive harassed them constantly, and made life miserable for them.
Now here is Paul, who is harassed by the Judaizers. They follow him everywhere, making life bitter for him, as he preached the Gospel. And he prays three times that this might leave him, that he might be free to preach the Gospel without this harassment. And God says, "No. My grace is sufficient for you. My power is made perfect in weakness."
I really believe that this is what is being talked about, that Paul in himself cannot stand this harassment. But in Christ, coming under the authority of Christ, and the power of Christ, he can continue. He can continue to bring the Gospel, even though he's got to be beaten a few more times.
CALLER: All right. Thank you very much for what you have said.
HC: Yes. And let me encourage you this way. First of all, it is a real hope that you are concerned and that you're beginning to face yourself honestly. Secondly, take one of these sins in your life. You mentioned a couple of them. And be very deliberate about this. Look at yourself honestly: "Okay, I've coddled myself. I've sympathized with myself. I've had pity on myself. I've prayed again and again, 'Oh Lord, forgive me.' But every time I've prayed, 'Lord, forgive me' after I'd done those things, I knew that when the temptation arose the next time I'd do it all over again. And so I really wasn't repenting." And this is the big word, repentance.
And now look at yourself very deliberately and say, "Now just a minute. I'm a child of God. I'm a son of the King. I'm of royal blood. And I don't have to live with these sins. They don't have control over me, and I've had it. I'm not going to live with them anymore. And as God strengthens me, I'm going to turn my back on them, and I'm through, I'm through. I'm not going to go through that experience anymore. I want my life to tell for Jesus. I don't want to serve Him only part way. I want to serve Him all the way.
Let me give one other suggestion. One of the deterrents in your life to taking this course of action is that deeply ingrained within you (and this is true of every born again believer), there is still self-pity. And you have experienced a certain amount of pleasure from these sins. Sin is pleasurable. We may as well face the sad truth that this is so. There is pleasure connected with it.
Now when you face the question that these sins have got to go, deep in your soul you're analyzing it this way, "But if they finally go, then I'm going to be depriving myself of something that is very pleasurable. They say that there's joy in obedience to Christ, but that certainly cannot be equal to the pleasure that I have been receiving from my sins." That is the deceitful nature of sin, you see, that makes us think that way.
But let me assure you that when you get victory over those sins because honestly you've repented of them and decided that they've got to go, that you want to serve Christ, Christ will strengthen you, when you get honest with yourself and begin to repent. You will find that indeed the joy of obedience, the joy of a clear conscience, the joy of not having that after-bite after the sin, is far far superior to any sinful joy you've received in these sins.
Now what you want to do is face yourself squarely, and take action, and repent. The reason we hesitate to repent is because we are hoping that God will sneak up on us and take that sin away without us looking. And then it's out of our control. But God doesn't work that way. He wants us to deliberately will that that sin has got to go. And He works through our wills. This is what repentance is.
And so you've got to turn your back on it, and deliberately decide that this sin has got to go, "I have had it."
CALLER: Thank you.
HC: Thank you for calling. Good night.